the calm twilight

fills my heart with disquiet
laying you to rest I embark, my full night's struggle ahead,

the river absorbs the black canvas above,
my kayak slicing through the velvet darkness
paddles scooping the water, indents casually refill
begging me to cut the self replenishing stone;
praying to feel the emptiness again, watching healed wounds open and remembering;
cycles of pain paired with the time frames of numbness and ignorance.
the quiet flow of liquid onyx beneath me rises
I am deaf to the tsunami as silent waters
drown out my cries, cold water rushing over my nose,
stifling my breath, my ears boxed;
my vision enveloped by the depths-blind and thrashing in the lightless waters

thousands of air bubbles rise around me, prodding me to inhale,
the hopes of capturing these minute sirens resounding

calypso's hand raises me above the surface for a moment of sustenance-too soon
poseidon's hand crashes over me
i fade deep, the crystal moonlight a poor tether

hours lead to a blackened shore, washed up amongst the iron sands. the hallucination of stability.
the attempt to catch me off guard once more;
my deep breaths mask the rising tide, and it stands: an aqueous skyscraper ,leans; races to the ground, thousands of shards of obsidian falling violently,
calculated,
cold slices catching me across the face, the chest;
coagulating tides slither around me, bounding my ankles, holding me captive, my feet sinking into the landscape;
immobile;
unable to fix my gaze elsewhere, the dark, oily sea a constant reminder
eclipsing sapphire eyes forevermore.